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When the News Feels Heavy

Caring for yourself,
your kids & each other 

There are times when the world feels especially heavy.

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Distressing stories can surface locally, across the province, Canada, and around the world. Some involve traumatic incidents and deep human suffering. It's natural to feel shaken by them, and it says something good about you, and that you care.
 

In modern days, where information is incredibly accessible, most of these stories don't only reach you through the evening news. They show up in Facebook posts, Instagram Reels, and TikTok, Snapchat stories, Reddit threads, WhatsApp groups, community pages, group chats, screenshots, and messages from people you know.
 

Sometimes you go looking for information. Other times, it finds you.
 

A video starts playing on its own. Someone forwards a screenshot. A local Facebook group fills with speculation. A teenager receives something in their snapchat streak. One post leads to another, and suddenly you've taken in far more than you meant to.
 

Wanting to understand what happened is deeply human. But there can come a point where staying informed quietly turns into repeated exposure to distress.

 

The good news is that there's a lot you can do about that, without having to stop caring.

Why repeated exposure matters

Your brain pays attention to possible danger.

Disturbing stories naturally capture our attention. It’s part of the brain’s protective system—when something feels threatening, we’re wired to notice it and look for information that might help us understand what’s happening.

Repeated exposure can keep that alarm system activated.

Each new video, image, update or disturbing detail can bring our attention back to the threat. Repeated reminders can keep drawing the brain’s attention back toward threat, making it harder for stress and distress activation to settle.

Social media can turn one event into dozens and dozens of exposures.

Algorithms can then show you more of what you stopped to watch, so one difficult event can follow you throughout the day.

 Over time, that can affect how you feel and function.

You may notice more anxiety or hypervigilance, difficulty concentrating or sleeping, intrusive thoughts or images, irritability, or feeling increasingly unsafe. For people with previous trauma, current events may also bring older memories or reactions closer to the surface.

This doesn't mean that reading difficult news automatically causes trauma. It means the amount and the type of exposure both matter, and both are things you can gently adjust.
 

At some point, another video or another comment thread may no longer be helping you understand what happened. It may simply be bringing the distress back again.

The goal isn’t to avoid difficult information.

It’s to recognize when staying informed has become repeated exposure to distress and to find a balance that allows you to stay informed without becoming overwhelmed, weighed down by what you’re seeing, or losing sight of where you still have choice and control.

Make the unfamiliar a little more familiar

teen support.jpeg

When current events stir up something older

Urban Teen Gathering

Protecting yourself even
if you're not able to disconnect

You don't have to choose between caring about what's happening and caring for yourself. A few small, practical changes can make a real difference.

Flip through the slides to explore a few strategies

Father And Son Basketball

Supporting kids and teens

Children and teens often hear more than adults realize. Their information may come from school conversations, TikTok, Instagram, Snapchat, YouTube, gaming chats, WhatsApp, or screenshots shared by friends. The reassuring part is that a calm, caring adult makes a big difference in how kids make sense of hard things.

A gentle way to start is...
 

There's been some difficult news people are talking about. What have you heard?

Then respond to what they actually know. Keep it honest, brief, and right for their age. They don't need graphic details, and it's okay to say "I don't know" when you don't.

For younger children, limit repeated exposure as much as you can, including news or adult conversations playing in the background. Child trauma experts recommend that the younger the child, the less media exposure they have

For older children and teens, get curious about their feeds:
 

  • What are people sharing?

  • Have you seen videos, reels, tiktoks, snapchats?

  • How do you feel after looking at it?
     

Help them mute, unfollow, or step away, rather than simply telling them to get off their phone. When they see you doing the same, it helps even more.
 

It's also helpful to remind them of the people and plans that help keep them safe, and to keep everyday routines as steady as possible. Predictable meals, bedtimes, and family routines are calming for a young nervous systems.
 

Keep an eye out for changes in sleep, behaviour, mood, concentration, physical complaints like stomach aches, school attendance/avoidance, or pulling away from friends/family or activities they enjoy. Kids don't always tell you they're overwhelmed. Sometimes they show you.

Supporting each other when a community is hurting

Different people can be affected in different ways.

Conversation in the Hallway

Some may have been directly exposed to what happened. Others may love or support someone who was. Some may be responding professionally. Others may feel deeply affected because the event connects with their own experiences, fears, or past trauma.

There is room for all of those reactions.

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What can help is being thoughtful about where we bring our support and where we take our own distress.​

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Support in, process out
 

When someone is closer to the impact than you are, try to bring care toward them without asking them to also carry your reaction.
 

That might look like:
 

  • Check in without asking for the story.
    “I’m thinking about you. You don’t need to tell me anything, but I’m here.”
     

  • Offer something specific.
    “Can I bring dinner?” “Do you need a ride?” “Would company or some space feel better today?”
    When someone is overwhelmed, “Let me know if you need anything” can require more decision making than they have capacity for.
     

  • Let them lead the conversation.
    They may want to talk about what happened. They may want to talk about anything but what happened. Both are okay.
     

  • Don’t seek details or updates from people closest to the event.
    Curiosity is human, but they should not have to repeatedly explain what happened so others can understand it.
     

  • Protect their control over information.
    Before sending an article, screenshot, video, social media post, or update, ask whether they want to receive it.
     

  • Keep showing up after the immediate attention fades.
    Support often arrives intensely at first. A message days or weeks later...“Still thinking about you. No need to respond”, can really help too.
     

And where does your own distress go?
 

Being farther from the centre of impact does not mean you aren’t allowed to be affected.
 

You may feel frightened, angry, heartbroken, helpless, or reminded of something from your own life.

Those reactions deserve care too.
 

The important distinction is who you ask to help you carry them.
 

If someone is more directly affected, try not to make them responsible for reassuring you, answering your questions, helping you understand what happened, or processing your feelings about it.
 

Instead, bring those needs outward: to someone less directly affected, a trusted friend or family member, your own therapist, spiritual/community support, or another appropriate source of care.

When early trauma support can help

Most people feel some distress after something frightening or overwhelming. For many, those reactions gradually ease with time, safety, connection, and support. That's your nervous system doing what it's designed to do.

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For some people, though, things don't settle on their own. They might stay highly activated, or start having intrusive memories, nightmares, panic, trouble sleeping, or a strong sense that the event is still happening emotionally, even though it's over.

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You don't need to wait months before asking for help. Early, trauma-focused support can be really useful when reactions are intense, getting worse, or getting in the way of everyday life.

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Alongside stabilization and practical support, trained trauma therapists may use approaches designed specifically for recent experiences. Within EMDR therapy, these include the Recent Traumatic Episode Protocol (R-TEP) and the Protocol for Recent Critical Incidents and Ongoing Traumatic Stress (PRECI).

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Rather than asking you to retell every detail of what happened, these approaches help identify and gently process the parts of a recent experience that still feel especially distressing. Early studies of both have found reductions in post-traumatic stress symptoms after critical incidents, including a trial of R-TEP with community members after a missile strike and a trial of PRECI with first responders. 

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The goal of early support isn't to turn a normal human reaction into a disorder. It's to notice when someone is having a harder time recovering on their own, ease distress where possible, strengthen coping and connection, and lower the chance that trauma symptoms settle in for the long term.

Support at Solis Wellbeing

If a recent event, or the coverage around it, has left you or someone you care about feeling unsettled, overwhelmed, and/or reminded of past experiences, support is available.

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At Solis Wellbeing, I offer trauma-informed therapy for children, teens, and adults, in person in Guelph and virtually across Ontario. I support people with both longer-standing trauma and reactions to more recent critical events.

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Depending on your needs, therapy may include stabilization, psychoeducation, EMDR therapy, recent-event EMDR approaches, Deep Brain Reorienting, Work at the Clay Field® (in person in Guelph), and other evidence-informed trauma therapies.

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You won't be rushed into processing before you're ready. The goal is to understand what's happening, ease distress, build a stronger sense of safety and stability, and figure out together what kind of support feels right for you. You're always welcome to reach out with questions.

When to reach out

It may help to talk with a licenced mental health professional if:
 

  • Intrusive memories or nightmares feel hard to manage

  • You feel consistently unsafe or on alert

  • Past trauma has been rekindled

  • You're avoiding or it's difficult to participate in everyday life  

  • Your sleep is significantly disrupted

  • You feel numb, like you're floating, disconnected, or unlike yourself

  • Work, school, parenting, or relationships are being affected

  • Your child or teen is showing changes that concern you

  • Your distress is getting worse rather than starting to settle with time
     

There's no required amount of time you need to struggle before asking for support.
Reaching out early is a strength, not an overreaction.

If this is urgent and
you need support right now

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  • Here 24/7 (Waterloo Wellington): 1-844-437-3247, for mental health, addictions, and crisis support
     

  • Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis 24-hour Crisis Line: 519-836-5710 or 1-800-265-7233, for people affected by sexual violence or abuse, and for concerned friends and family
     

  • Assaulted Women's Helpline: 1-866-863-0511, 24 hours, with support in many languages
     

  • Hope for Wellness Helpline: 1-855-242-3310 
     

  • BREATHE Helpline (Black Mental Health Canada): 1-800-917-0272
     

  • Kids Help Phone: 1-800-668-6868 or text CONNECT to 686868
     

  • 9-8-8 Suicide Crisis Helpline: call or text 9-8-8
     

  • Emergency: call 911​

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